Monday, August 30, 2010

Mark Twain

“Do not tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don’t tell them where they know the fish.”

Friday, August 20, 2010

TWO MINUTES OF INFAMY

AUGUST HEAT

DRAWING BY MY PAL LARRY ALLEN, ca 1978

two nights before my 72nd birthday
by Charles Bukowski

sitting here on a boiling hot night while
drinking a bottle of cabernet sauvignon
after winning $232 at the track
there's not much I can tell you except
if it weren't for my bad right leg
I don't feel much different than I did
30 or 40 years ago
(except that now I have more money and should be able
to afford a decentburial).
also, I drive better automobiles and have
stopped carrying a switchblade.
I am still looking for a hero, a role model,
but can't find one.
I am no more tolerant of Humanity
than I ever was.
I am not bored with myself and find
that I am the only one I can
turn to in time of
crisis.
I've been ready to die for decades and
I've been practicing, polishing up
for that end
but it's very
hot tonight
and I can think of little but
this fine cabernet,
that's gift enough for me.
sometimes I can't
believe I've come this far,
this has to be some kind of goddamned
miracle!
just another old guy
blinking at the forces,
smiling a little,
as the cities tremble and the left
hand rises,
clutching
something
real.

I have a variation of Larry's drawing on my wall. It had always reminded me of a story I read in the Seventh Grade called "August Heat", written by William Harvey. This I have told Larry for almost as many years as his drawing has been in existence.
But I saw this poem today and I matched it to Larry's portrait. I think it fits quite well.
Now, I am going to provide you with a link to Harveys story.
CLICK HERE
I don't expect you to read it all, though it is a great short story, but I would love for you to take note of the date on the letterhead that begins the story and tell yourself that synchronicity does not abound today.
This August Heat.
Man.
Its givin' me chills

Monday, August 09, 2010

TRY NOT TO CRY


WEDDING SCHEDULE
Thursday pick up Tux @ 5:00, go to store to buy Exotic Fruits from Faraway Lands and Special Imported Cheeses like you never heard of to use for the Reception. Buy every Cream Puff in the county to make Groomscake. Try not to cry.
Friday morning @8:00 set up tables with fancy frilly ribbons and bows and elegant centerpieces. Slice cheeses into unusual shapes and carve fruits into interesting bite sized pieces that look like they would be fun to eat and in order to create stunning, one of a kind display. Try not to cry.
Get ready for Rehearsal, learn to dance, prepare and memorize speech, practice walking down the aisle, we're walking, we're walking, walkin' the aisle. Go to Rehearsal Dinner, forget speech, toasting, toasting, toasting, Cannolis! Try not to cry.
Saturday morning, get up get dressed get blessed try to be a success, go to Church, coffee, coffee,sweat shake, praying to Jesus, dipping Cream Puffs in carmelized sugar and making huge pyramid called a Croquembouche for the Grooms cake. Set up Fantastik display of Fruits and Cheeses, breads and table-water crackers, more style than Lady Gaga. Try not to cry.
Leaving Church, hungry, no can eat, go home coldshower, dry hair, hairspray, hairspray, hairspray. Praying to Jesus again, faith and gas in truck back to church for Wedding photos. She's beautiful, yes,yes, yes, click, snap, flash, smiling and praying to Jesus.
Holding her hand, walkin' the aisle, try not to cry, walkin' the aisle, praying to Jesus,walkin' the aisle. Try not to cry.
Givin' away the Bride.
Cry. Cry Cry.
Reception, whirling dizzy, shaking the hands, huggin' the mother, pattin' the back, shakin' the hands, forgot how to dance. Try not to cry.
Cry.

Monday, August 02, 2010

HAIRY


I had a dream last night. In the dream I met an old friend I had not seen in a long time. I said:"I'm so glad to see you! Its been so long!" and she said:"No, it hasn't been that long at all. I saw you in your previuos dream as well"And I thought about it for a minute and yes, she was right! So I said:'Yes, but you've changed your hair."
It was a very strange, hairy dream indeed.

FORMULA 4 LOVE




"You sat in front of me and one row over in my Reading class in the Seventh Grade. You were a smart girl, I could tell that right away. So in my notebook , I scrawled a very scientific looking formula down, with numbers and integers, some in parenthesis, some to the power of ten ; others with multiplication symbols, interspersed throughout with letters from the Periodic Chart of the Elements ; the symbols for Square Roots, Pi, Ohms, Infinity and Beyond. I did my best to make it look very scientific and completely valid.
At the very bottom of the page I would write, in very large dramatic letters, these words:"

"EQUALS ONE HELL OF AN EXPLOSION"

"Then, as stealthily as possible, I would let this piece of notebook paper fall off my desk and float towards yours, hopefully landing at your feet, where you would notice it, pick it up and see all the Mathematical Equations I had generated and think that I was a Scientist and Scholar of the highest degree, worthy of your consideration.
I thought if you could see how smart I was, you might like me.
It didn't work.
You never once looked at my formula , but just politely handed my paper back to me.
The great and wonderful part of this whole story is how we got to be such good friends anyway."