Friday, September 27, 2019

BACK IN THE USSR


Why does the disgraced Russian Prosecutor Viktor Sholkin look so familiar?
Crack him in half and AG William Barr pops out.
So here’s the deal on Shokin. He is the one that Biden wanted fired. As Prosecutor General Sholkin was supposed to be investigating a company of corrupt Russian Oligarchs called Burisma. Bidens son was part of the board of directors of that company. The charges against the company were from BEFORE Biden's son joined the board.
Shokin had proved himself to be more of a protector of corruption and the political elite than a prosecutor of it. Shokin became an enemy of anti-corruption and watchdog groups, even to the point of an assassination attempt. My blog buddy in the Ukraine wrote a lot about Shokin back during the Ukranian Revolution of 2014.
In 2016 the Obama Administration withheld a billion dollars in loan guarantees to pressure the Ukrainian government to remove Shokin from office.
The IMF was withholding 40 BILLION to pressure the Ukrainian government to remove Shokin from office. Most of Western Europe was holding SOMETHING to try to pressure the Ukraine to get rid of Shokin.
Was Biden and the Obama administration wrong to leverage Russia into firing a corrupt Prosecutor General?
Maybe not.
Did it have any effect on Biden’s political enemies, or elections here in the United States of America?
I think not.

Wednesday, September 18, 2019

GOD AND ELECTRICITY



I called last week to the electric company to get my NA group's contract renewed.  
They went up on their electricity by two cents a kilowatt hour. It doesn't sound like much but it's $60 a month.
I called another provider to see if I could get a better rate. They offered me two tenths of a cent less, which is not enough that I would switch providers. Then the girl on the phone asked me who it was again the service was for.
I said Another Chance Group of Narcotics Anonymous.
She said “You guys do good work down there don't you? Let me talk to my supervisor and see if we can do better.”
She puts me on hold. I’m thinking if she can save me a penny per kilowatt I might switch.
She comes back on the line.
“Mr. Renfro, I can get you 4.7 cents per kilowatt!”
That is 2.2 cents less, in fact, its less than we have been paying.
Then my trust issues start to kick in.
“What about hidden fees? I ask “What about delivery charges?”
“No Mr. Renfro, no hidden fees, same delivery charges as the other provider”
Well, down at Another Chance we have a saying that goes like this:
“Either you trust God or you don’t” and God seems to be sending me a good electric rate, the same way he sends boats and helicopters and half off coupons for TV dinners. All you have to do is climb aboard or cut them out of the paper.
I said “Yes ma’am, sign me up” and I can start to feel the lump in my throat.
She asks for the address, and the name of the group again and she gets to the part about what city.
“We are in…H-H-H” and it starts to hit me.
The overwhelming sense of gratitude and humility.
I start over.
“We are in Hu-Hu-Hurst” and then I just break down crying.
“What’s the matter Mr. Renfro? Are you OK?” she asks.
“You don’t know h-h-how much this m-m-means to me” and its true. How can I tell her? How can I tell her what we do there?
How can I tell her that once upon a time I couldn’t even have a bank account, and now I am the Master of Coin, the Treasurer for the group, and how not only do I pay MY BILLS ON TIME, I pay the groups bills on time too. And that once upon a time I owed every electric company in the world, and now here I am, setting up electricity for my group?
Miracle! All of it!

I do the same thing when I renew my KERA Membership. But that’s a whole ‘nother story.

ROXY'S

I was at Roxy’s disco one night back in the 80’s. There was a girl I worked with, Lulu, Lulu LeBons, and we danced a couple times and she sat at the table with me. The music was loud, and all thumpa-thumpa, and at some point she looked at me and said “I need a kiss”. So I grabbed her and started kissing her (that’s what I do, I just cant help myself) and she was kissing back, so that’s a good sign, and her kisses were sweet and ferocious, and our tongues danced like David Lee Roth, shirtless, breathless, endless end of the world kisses; my hand was on her breast, hers on my thigh, both of us squirming thumpa-thumpa on our bar stools. 
People walked past and said “Get a room” but we paid them no mind.
Finally, we broke our embrace and untangled our tongues.
She said “Whew, what was that about?”
I said “You said you needed a kiss”
She said “No, I said I needed to piss”

Friday, September 13, 2019

WHY I HAVENT BEEN LAID LATELY


I had a dentist appointment yesterday. Just a check up and cleaning with my favorite dentist of 30 years now. I call him Dr Death, but he is one competent dentist with an ouitstanding sense of humor, who gives you sunglasses to wear while you are under that bright ass light.
I asked him “Can you get me Joe Biden’s teeth?”
Dr Death said “Steve, you don’t want Joe's teeth. He is using radioactive isotopes as tooth polish. In a few years, except for his teeth, he will be unrecognizable”
“But Doc, I got to do something about these teeth. My entire generation is quickly realizing that while it was our HAIR that used to get us laid, now its our TEETH. Isn’t it time to just pull them all and give me dentures so I can look like Pierce Brosnan the way all my other over 60 friends are doing?”
“You aren’t there yet” said Dr Death.
"When will it come to that?" I asked
He said "About 40 years"
"OK" I said "You'll still be here, yes? Can I go ahead and schedule?"