This Sophomoric Trickery

George Will on congress and the renaming of the renaming of Army bases, including Fort Bragg, renamed to Fort Liberty, and back again:


 "The legislation, which included a stipulation that no base would ever again have a Confederate’s name, inspired a provision in the 2021 defense authorization bill [passed by congress] that became law over President Donald Trump’s veto. In 2025, however, the second Trump administration, practicing what it evidently considers sophisticated trickery, restored the names. Sort of.

"Fort Bragg, which briefly was Fort Liberty, is now renamed back to Fort Bragg. Not, however, for Confederate Gen. Braxton Bragg, but for Pfc. Roland L. Bragg, who won a Silver Star in World War II. Fort Pickett, which briefly became Fort Barfoot, is again Fort Pickett. This time, however, the name (we are supposed to believe) honors not the Virginian who led Pickett’s Charge at Gettysburg, but Vernon W. Pickett, a lieutenant who in World War II won a Distinguished Service Cross.

"This sophomoric trickery — the cleverness of the dim-witted — by the commander in chief is intended to mock the law. This is what now passes for fulfilling the president’s constitutional duty to “take care that the laws be faithfully executed.”

https://www.washingtonpost.com/.../nebraska-rep-don.../

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Clean and Sober, Or Just Clean?

I say clean and sober. I happen to be both, even if the one is known to be all inclusive to us.. Just saying I’m clean might be a bit vague for some folks not in the fellowship.
A few years back I went to a birthday paty at the Chicken Pickle place. A cute little red haired girl came wiggling up to me. We really seemed to hit it off.
At some point I told her I had 16 years clean and sober.
“oh that’s great” she says “but do you get high?”
“Well no” I said “I’ve got 16 years clean and sober. No booze or dope”
And she says again “But do you get high?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
She says “You know, like pot and gummies”

LOL, well no, my darling new friend, those are off the menu too.

Forty Mother's Days Gone

Aw man, I had that dream again. You know, the one where you feel bad because you hadn't called your mother in so long, so you flip open your phone and cant figure out why she's not on your list.

You look under mom. Nothing. You look under Doris. Nada.
You take a shot at Mrs Renfro, but that makes no sense. You've never called your mother Mrs Renfro.
Then it hits you, why she is not in your phone.
It's a real shame too because Mrs Renfro loved to talk on the phone. I can see her now on the couch, but without the 20-foot cord that attaches to the yellow wall phone. She has an iPhone. Top of the line. She sent out who knows how many messages this morning. She's yakked up with who knows how many people.
And now she's ordering a pie from Tippin's. Probably a chocolate coconut cream.
Happy Mother's Day Mom!

THE REAL WORLD

 (-3) x (-6)= 18

Huh?
(-3) x (-6)= 18
Multiply two negatives and you get a positive. There is even a logical explanation for it, I know there is because I just read it, but I’ll be damned if I can explain it back to you.
So, (-3) x (-6)= 18.

That’s the one I’m sure I missed on the College Entrance Exam I took last night.
I was never any good at math.
That’s not true.
Once upon a time I was good at math. Good enough to land myself into an Honors Algebra class. But it was there that I learned how to not do my homework and barely pass. Mainly because I had discovered girls. Girls were my new Major. I passed algebra without really being able to do any algebra. That’s a real art man, one that I almost perfected. From there I went on to flunk Geometry, then Chemistry, and find myself as a senior in need of one single math credit in order to graduate from LD Bell.

That’s how I came to walk into room C-3 for my last shot at passing a math for dummies class. There stood Mr. Barker.
Mr. Barker had been my teacher for those failed Geometry and Chemistry classes. He took one look at me and said “Steve, after I call roll you can go to the office and see about a transfer to a different class if you like.”
I stumbled into my desk and said “No, Mr. Barker, I’m going to pass one of your dumb math classes if it’s the last thing I do” and the whole class busted out laughing.
See, I was one of these guys that sat there, and when Mr Barker said “Two plus two equals four” I would loudly proclaim “Yeah, like when will I ever be able to use THAT out in the real world.”

Well, it didn’t take too long to find out. As a chef I learned to do food costs, and price menus; I figured labor percentages, and planned budgets. I actually spent about a year doing light accounting when I was assistant manager at a restaurant.

Even doing tile work, figuring square footage and how much material was needed for a job I utilized more math skills than I ever would have dreamed of as a young punk. I even got to use the Pythagorean Theorem (even though Pythagoras didn’t actually invent it; the Incas and Chinese had been using it for a thousand years before he came along, although I shouldn’t slight the man for that) in order to draw out a perfect right-angle grid for laying a floor.

 So I was surprised last night when I took the math portion of the college entrance exam and thought I was doing pretty well, except for that darn multiplication of a negative. I never had to use that in the real world.
But who knows? Just like 2+2=4, it could come in handy someday.
See?
"If a cat can run up and down a tree in a minute, how many times can a cat and a half run up and down a tree and a half in a minute and a half?"

Addendum~ Apparently I didn't go as well as I thought. The University informed me after grading my exam that before I did any online courses I should go to a local community college and take some math courses..."in person".