The Psych Ward

I did end up in the psyche ward once. The ex wife took me in. The doctor came out with his clipboard, asked me a bunch of questions, wrote stuff down.‘
"Any thoughts of killing yourself"
“No not too much”
‘Are you doing any illegal drugs”
“Yes”
“What kind?”
“Meth mostly”
“What does that do for you?”
“Makes me feel good, and funny. I’m funnier on meth”
“A comedian?” he asked.
“Yes, kind of” I said and he wrote something on his clip board.
“Do you ever drive while you are using?”
“Yes, all the time”
“Don’t you think that’s dangerous?
“No”
And he wrote something down on his clipboard.
“If you have been up all night, and you get in the car to drive the kids somewhere, you don’t think that’s dangerous”
“No, not really doc”
And I thought about it for a few seconds and added
“You know the dope I do, that’s the same dope they give fighter pilots”
The doc looked at me over the tops of his glasses and said “Oh, so you are a fighter pilot now” and wrote something on his clipboard.