Friday, August 31, 2018


So, now that McCain is gone and being daily smeared exclusively by his own party, I just wonder who it is my Republican friends admire so much within their own party that has any kind of record of accomplishment.
Is it Sarah Palin, who provided the intellectual underpinnings of the current GOP? Where the hell has she been?
Is it Paul Ryan, or Trey Gowdy? Because they have abandoned ship.
Is it Mitch McConnell, or will the five term Senator be deemed part of “The Swamp” based mostly on his length of service (TERM LIMITS!) and whether or not he wants to kiss Trumps ass any given day?
Maybe it Lindsay Graham, one of McCains best friends? Can he last in the good favors of his own party, given that infelicity?
Or maybe Jeff Sessions, the Attorney General with one foot on the platform, and the other on the train? What about Mitt? Has he disqualified himself by half-heartedly taking a stand against Trump? What about the other 15 candidates from 2016? Which ones are honorable? Which ones are part of the swamp?
Take your pick. “Little Marco” or “Lyin’ Ted” whose father killed Kennedy.
How about Carly Fiorina, whom Trump disparaged for her looks.
 "Look at that face!" he cries. "Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president?!"  

Hold it. I know. Allen West, the one term guy from Florida. From where I sit, he ranks number two in promoting hair-brained conspiracy theories, right behind the big cheese.
So really, I want to know. What can I look forward to the next six years. Who will be the swamp, and who will be the new hero’s of the Republican Party?
Who wants to go on record?
Because I cant think of any one in the Democratic Party that’s worth a shit, except for Stormy Daniels lawyer, who says he plans to run.
Fuck that. Lets put her in charge.


They tore another statue down last night, this time at the University of North Carolina. They called him "Silent Sam". He was erected in 1913. The dedication speech was given by an ex Confederate soldier who said:
"One hundred yards from where we stand, less than ninety days perhaps after my return from Appomattox, I horse whipped a negro wench until her skirts hung in shreds because she had maligned and insulted a Southern lady, and then rushed for protection to these University buildings where was stationed a garrison of 100 Federal soldiers. I performed the pleasing duty in the immediate presence of the entire garrison."

Isn't it odd that Democrats put these statues up 100 years ago as part of their racist agenda. an agenda that Republicans like to point to when criticizing the Democratic Party, and now Democrats want to tear them down, and the Republicans want to keep them up. Thats pretty funny, haha.

Thursday, August 23, 2018




I got to speak on the 12 Steps the last month down at my NA Group. Four hours total over four nights.
On night three, I had to cram in 5,6,7,8, and 9, because I had spent two weeks just doing 1-4..
I spent a lot of time talking about Step 8 and 9, and talking about my son. How we had come up together in our addiction. Not that we ever used together, we didn’t. He had introduced me a few years ago at a meeting I spoke at by saying “My dad, he taught me how to be an addict. But when it came time to get clean, he showed me how to do that too”.
Thats why I say we came up in our addiction together.

I talked about him a lot regarding the 8th and 9th Steps. I said:
“I tell my son I will always owe him. All those times I left him waiting on the curb for me to show up and didn’t. All those times we could have gone fishing, but I was out chasing dope, or else coming off a run and too tired to do anything. The times I would leave in the middle of the night, and not get back home until way into the next morning.  The opportunities I had to be a good dad, to tell him the right thing to do, but had no credibility to tell him anything. I’ll always owe him. But the best amend I can make to him is to never do any dope again today, and practice the principles of the 12 Steps in all my affairs. To participate in my own life. It may be that the very best amend I can make to him, which I struggle with even today, is to have a clean and tidy apartment when he pops in to visit.
There is a lady at work and her son is in the program. She talks about how he tries to make amends to her, but he isn’t very good at it. When I think about that, I cant help but wonder what kind of an amend my son should make to me. And I just cant think of a thing. Because I will always owe him. But some of you youngsters, you may be thinking you need to make an amend to your folks. And you might wonder how to make that amend. I would tell you its just like the one I make to my son. Live the program, be forgiving, practice some unconditional love. Be kind. Do good work. Keep car insurance and drive careful. Stay alive and tell the truth. And above all…call your mother...Just call your mother, OK?

Saturday, August 18, 2018


I had this girlfriend that used to give me a silver dollar for every month we made it. I didn't really realize how weird that was until just now.
Twenty two shining silver dollars I kept in a Sir Walter Raleigh can.
I remember when I got married a couple years later, and my bride asked me where I got all the silver dollars.
I lied.
I told her about how my grandfather had been a bank robber. He was the most famous bank robber in the whole country outside of Bonnie and Clyde. He operated between Detroit, Chicago, Erie Pennsylvania, up through Buffalo and Niagara hitting all the major financial institutions, and occasionally riding in a barrel over the falls. Grandfather was a daredevil. Over the years he probably robbed a hundred banks, they say, and never got caught, do tell. He settled in Texas down around Lufkin way, bought 60 acres of land did a little wildcattin’. Struck oil back around 1936. Anyway the way the laws worked the paper currency he stole wasn't as big a problem as the silver coin. So he buried the silver dollars on his property in Sir Walter Raleigh cans. Leastways that was the story . When I was little boy and my cousin Mark and I would go down there, he and his buddies would be in the barn, cigarette smoke and the soft smell of whiskey in the air, and playing dominoes, 42 mostly. To get rid of us he'd send us out with a shovel looking to dig up a Sir Walter can full of silver dollars. One day me and my cousin dug up two rusty cans full of silver dollars. We had not really believed him until then. He died the next year. We sure did a lot of digging after that never to find another rusty can full of silver dollars.
That's what I told her.
Then she clobbered me.

Tuesday, August 14, 2018


There was a cool Frontline Report on PBS last night called "Our Man In Tehran". He went around talking to a lot of people about a lot of different things.
He went to an AA Meeting! They had an AA Meeting in Iran! They had a copy of the AA book in Iranian. The government lets them have that. Normally, such a secular book would be censored. There were about 12 in the meeting, including two women.

He asked a guy “So with alcohol against the law, how do you get booze?”
“I have a phone number. I can call a man, He will deliver it to my house”
“But what happens if you get caught?”
“I will go to trial and be sentenced.”
“What will your sentence be?”
“I will be flogged”
“Have any of you been flogged?”
They all laugh.
“Yes, we have all been flogged”
“Does it hurt?”
“Yes, they use a leather horsewhip. It tears your skin”
“How many lashes?”
“Seventy Seven”
“Seventy seven lashes. Did you stop your drinking?”
They all laugh.
“No, we did not stop”
Even the Iranian government cannot make them stop.
That’s why they allow the book.

Monday, August 06, 2018


Outside my apartment squirrel has worn a spot in the earth at the base of the mesquite. 

He rests there after his busy mornings.
In the shade and cool earth he hardly notices me anymore as I come and go. Its nice to not be noticed, to be that much a part of his world and accepted.
Now there is a downy woodpecker, busy in the tree above the squirrel. He works silently on something unknown to me. It seems strange there is no tap-tapping, and were it not for his little cap of red I may not have noticed him at all.
Even the resting squirrel has paid him no mind.
It will comfort me should woodpecker be back today.
Are there trees near you?
Have you found any acceptance?

Steve 7/29/2018, with a tip o the hat to Mary Oliver.