Tuesday, April 06, 2010

"Gaiety is the most outstanding feature of the Soviet Union."

"Who's going to remember all this riff-raff in ten or twenty years time? No one. Who remembers the names now of the boyars Ivan The Terrible got rid of? No one."

I was dreaming that I was the Chief Architect of Joseph Stalin's efforts to rewrite history by casting him in a more favorable light. In the dream, he always kept his back to me, looking out his window towards Gorky Park. He tasked me with reducing the number of deaths attributed to his policies from 60 million down to a mere 2 million.
I told Stalin that it would be impossible to get the number below 4 million, and that there was no way we could blame Trotsky for the demise of Russian Orthodox Church and the Godless state we were now in.
At last he turned around to order me off to some frozen Gulag and there he was...
My friend Bobby!
Bobby! You killer!
I woke up, laughin' my Bolshevic ass off!

Here's my friend Bobby in his Stalin uniform barely able to contain his gaeity.


Citizen H said...

Sounds familiar.

bulletholes said...

Do you know Bobby? lol
Or did you have the same dream?
Actually, it came from a comment elsewhere, but i can't imagine you having seen it.
Hey Citizen! Long time man!

Anonymous said...

Gaiety and Great Terror. An unbeatable combination!

dmarks said...

"U S S R, it's fun to stay in the U S S R, yay. They have everything for young men to enjoy. You can hang out at the Bolshoi ! It's fun to stay in the..."