Friday, January 21, 2011


When I was in the fifth grade, about 1966 or so, there was a TIME Magazine that came to the house. I'll never forget the cover. There was a girl in a bikini, not a string bikini mind you, but one of those 60's Grandma style two-pieces. The headline for the Magazine said "THE NUDE LOOK".
So I picked up the magazine and took it into the kitchen where Mom was warming up the Totinos Pizza rolls for dinner and asked:
"Mom, what does "NUDE" mean?"
And she bustled over to the sink and washed her hands. I thought maybe she didn't hear me, so I stepped over to the sink and asked again:
"Mom, what does "NUDE" mean?"
And she looked down at the magazine, avoiding any eye contact with me, and she turned back to the stove to check on the pizza rolls. So I asked again:
'Mom, what..." but before I could finish, she said:
"Stevie, go wash your hands, dinner is ready."
I think about that all the time, that is to say, that little scene crosses my mind every now and then. The thing is, I already knew what nude was. In fact, upstairs under my toy box I had three Playboy magazines I'd found while out trash pickin' the week before. I'll never forget the day a few weeks later I came home from school and my little stash of Playboys was gone.


Anonymous said...

Like I might have said before: I love this. UF Mike

Anonymous said...

It reminds me of my own teen years, when I'd do anything to lay my hands on some porn, so I could lay a hand on myself. Fortunately, I had three brothers, so you could happen upon a porn stash anywhere. There were secret deposits here, there, and everywhere, and the best thing about it was if our mom discovered one of them, we boys could all point fingers at each other. And did. UF Mike

bulletholes said...

There is a part two, three, four, and five to this somewhere.

Anonymous said...

Your Mom should be glad instead. (Just saying to ease everyone's mind). There are a lot worse magazines she could have found. Not from experience spoken here, but gay porn or Nazi party, Militias or the body of the Republican Party, for instance... good story, Steve!