A small zoo in Arkansas had a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks
the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon
examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in
season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.
Thinking
about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Bobby Lee Walton, a redneck
part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages. Bobby Lee, like
most rednecks, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female
of any species.
The
Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Bobby Lee was approached with a
proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?
Bobby
Lee showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over
carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer,
but only under four conditions.
1.
"First", Bobby Lee said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the
lips." The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.
2.
"Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about
this." The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.
3.
"Third", Bobby Lee said, "I want all the childrun raised
Southern Baptist." Once again it was agreed.
4.
And last of all, Bobby Lee stated "You gotta give me another week to come
up with the $500.00."
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