Wednesday, March 10, 2010

AS I COOKED DINNER AND THE EX TALKED TO MY SON IN THE LIVING ROOM

“Rip, your Dad has the most addictive personality I’ve ever seen. He’s been addicted to Bubble-gum, Model Rockets and Boy Scouts. He had a fifty dollar a week Raisin Bran habit till he burned himself out, then he started hittin' the hard stuff, the Grape Nuts.
He has been addicted to Hearts, Golf, Bowling, Bob Dylan, Fishing, and Gardening. I caught him playing Risk all by himself one night. He has been addicted to Badminton, for Gods sakes!
And now... your dad is completely addicted to Narcotics Anonymous!”

It was at this point that I had to come out of the kitchen, flailing my hands about and shrieking like a madman:
“I’m addicted allright, and I just can’t stop !!! Its too late, I am hooked on NA, and I just keep going back to meetings almost everyday! I have it bad!!”
It was then she said what she always says at times like that, which is:
“Are you going to let me finish?”

5 comments:

soubriquet said...

Those are always ominous words.....
what came next?

Dave Renfro said...

I could write this same post except with autocrossing, fishing, photography, bagpipes, guitars, drums, miniature pulling tractors, and then kayaking, except I'm not sure I'm as addicted to kayaking as you are to NA meetings. You could do worse, my friend!

Barbara said...

One big happy family!

red dirt girl said...

I finally figured out that I'm addicted to being sad... how sad is that ?? Keep up the hard work!

Anonymous said...

I'm with Red Dirt Girl. But I'm looking for a cure. More NA meetings would probably help.

Your pal, UF Mike