Monday, May 19, 2014

DUMB AND DUMBER

Last Year over the period of 3 months I managed to lose almost 30 pounds.
I was eating right, and walking 4 times a week. There were days I lost two pounds.
I reduced the amount of diabetes medicine I take by half.
Then my scale broke. I stopped walking so much. The cookies down at Albertsons started jumping back in my cart.

After a couple months, I decided I sure did need that scale. I was worried how much weight I might have gained. So I went and bought a scale.  But when I got home and stepped on it, I was only up 5 pounds!
FIVE POUNDS!
That was like a small victory. I could shed those five pretty darn quick by going for a couple walks.
But I didn’t.
Then one day I stepped on the scale and I was up another five.
SHIT!
But that’s not too bad; if I really get on it I can knock those ten back pretty quick, doncha think?
And besides, I’m still good by almost 20 pounds, and just as pretty as ever.  
Why stress? Stress is not healthy, not healthy at all!

So another month goes by, and a couple times it looks like I’m starting to edge up another 5, I’m tap-tap-tapping on 265 every now and then, but the next day, I’m back at 260, and 255 isnt far from 260, except one day I’m solid on the 265 mark, might even call it 267 if we stop rounding to the fives,  only its not one day anymore it’s a full week that I’ve hit 267, and all that medicine I didn’t need to take anymore, I’m having to take it some more. In fact, I cant seem to get those blood sugar numbers down down down to where they are supposed to be even though I keep bumping up up up with the medicine, and the doctor is gonna kick my ass next time I go in because he can tell that I have been playing catch-up with the medicine, and they have a scale at the doctors office, and he is going to see that I have gained 17 pounds back of the 30 I lost, except I just weighed again and damned if I haven’t shot up to 272 now.
All because somewhere along the line I stopped walking 4 or 5 days a week.

I lost 30 pounds and gained back 24. I feel like the guy in Vegas that hit the jackpot for $4000 at midnite, and now its 8am and he  is turning a weird shade of green because he's played it down to $6.50. The crowd that cheered him on is now vanished, except for the couple looking at him laughing and shaking their heads over at the coffee shop.

How dumb is that? 
I lost 30 pounds and now I’ve gained almost all of it back. It just snuck up on me over a 6 month period.
How dumb is that? 
I feel so dumb.
That’s as dumb as starting smoking again. Its been six years since I quit smoking.
I may as well just start smoking again if I’m going to be that dumb. 
See you in Vegas.


3 comments:

soubriquet said...

Come and do yardwork in the heat....
I won't even charge you for the work-out!

Since I came here, and stopped doing the job that constantly had me lugging heavy tools and materials around, mixing cement, digging holes, etc, up and down ladders, and, yes, walking miles each day, I've become rounder. My ribs are harder to find. Up until...oh, about fifteen years ago I had the physique of a racing snake, no layer of fat anywhere. My weight stayed the same no matter what I did or ate... Until I was about thirty I bought my pants with a 28 inch waist. What happened? Well, I got older and slightly wiser.
I keep my wisdom in a layer around the middle.

I'm guessing you're wise around the middle too.

bulletholes said...

Since taking this desk job ten years ago I'm up about 50 pounds.
I have a little garden, about 10x6 outside my apartment. I dug about, tilled in (by hand) some mulch and good Scottish peat, and planted about 30 plants a while back.
It liked to kill this old cowboy.

You know its not hot yet, right?
Hey Soub!

red dirt girl said...

Ahh ..... I see he made NO MENTION of the fact that he bakes, from scratch, 3 loaves of bread about every other day.

You can guess who's getting wiser around the middle ... !

xxx

ps. I keep telling him this is not HOT.