Friday, December 01, 2006

DORIS

Thanks Mom....
... for waiting the six hours for me to apologize for spitting in your face. I was three.
... for playing “Tarzan” with me and keeping a straight face, staying in Character as I wrestled the Giant Snake to protect you, even though it was just a Vacuum cleaner hose.
...for yanking me out of the street while I played Chicken with the Hoodlum down the street and his 55 Chevy.
...for always calling me ‘Stephen” when I was in trouble, giving me a little time to brace myself.
...for taking such good care of me after I moved back home to take care of you after your stroke.
...for laughing harder than I while Shila tickled me to tears on the couch.
...for “hanging on” long enough for me to get back home. Did you hear the wild geese? Is that what that sound was?

My most indelible image of Mom is when she would ask me when Shila and I were going to have a Baby...
“Oh, Mom, I don’t know, sometime here, I guess...”
In her little girl singsong voice she would reply...
“Oh, Stevie, you just have to hurry”,
Then holding her arms as though she were cradling a baby
“It would be so terrible if I didn’t get to hold her”
She missed it by a year and this is my most regrettable regret.
All you youngsters out there, don’t let this happen.

Mom died on December 1st, 1986. Dad was in a VA hospital with Alzheimers.
If there is someone responsible for letting Mom die first, thank you.
Very kind.

10 comments:

Dave Renfro said...

Very kind of you! I wish I could remember more about your Mom.

GrizzBabe said...

She sounds like a sweet and patient person. And you were such a good son.

Mother of Invention said...

What a great tribute to your mom! Do you think she can see this? I always like to think so.... maybe she can see you children.
You sound like a really funny kid, yet sensitive to all the important things. You probably have not changed. keep on being YOU and sharing that with us!

Barbara said...

Unfortunately we have to live with all the mistakes we made after our parents are gone. I wish there was a chance for do-overs. She's probably up there smiling down on you today looking at her grandchildren and holding them in her own way.

Annelisa said...

This really touched something in me, Steve.

In my family, it was my dad who went first (heart) in 1986, just a few years before I started having children. I always regret that he never met them - and they him!

And now my mum has Alzheimers, and has had to move into a home last year.

Funny you should say you were glad your mum went first. I always thought my dad should, because I knew he wouldn't have been able to hold it together the other way round.

This was a wonderful post to remember your mum. It's made me want to go and see mine...

Anonymous said...

sweet memories and a hint of regret.....a huge dose of reality and lots of thankfulness.....

brave soul, cowboy for letting us have a peek at your heart.....

rdg

bulletholes said...

Thanks to all for your kind comments. Mom was tough and sweet. Having to put your Husband into a VA hospital must be a very hard thing to do. He was there far 10 years, a very long time and the hospital was far away. I am grateful that she did not have to go through the trauma of his death a year later. Her last days were very happy, thanks to the Ex-mrs. Bulletholes.

bulletholes said...

By the way, Annelisa, I wrote this in part at least, for you because I noted you have an alzheimers parent. There are more to come about this, I think.

Mother of Invention said...

I always hope my mom goes first because my dad has the strength and zest for life to carry on more effectively than my mom. They are 87 and 85 so who knows what will happen, but I know it will be soon and I won't be prepared, even though that have both had a long and happy life.

Old Lady said...

It's good you have good memories of your ma. They will keep warm and happy.