Wednesday, December 19, 2007

JAWBONE OF AN ASS

Senior Year of High School, its like a dream come true...
Im sitting right in between Velvet and Lacy in Velvet's Funky Ford Gran Turino...we've been hangin' together for a coupla days and like any idiot horndog adolescent, I'm wonderin' which one of these babes to try to bust a move on.
Since Velvet is drivin' I figure it must be Lacy's lucky day.
I lean to the right a little, but my arm over her shoulder, flash her my best smile and say '"what about you and me?'"

She doesn't have to say a word...I can see that she is horrified....
Now these two girls have the sweetest voices;
Velvet is from Georgia and Lacy...
...well her voice is just as Dixie as can be....
...either of them could turn Lemonade into Pure Ribbon Cane Syrup and what Lacy tells me soooo sweetly is this...

"Oh Steve I just couldn't. I'm in love with Bluesman"
"Bluesman? The dude with the army jacket that plays guitar in his driveway and drives that Falcon?"
"Yay-yess!" she drawls "And I'll love him forever!"
'Thats Cool" I say.

After a long silent moment, I turn to inflict myself on Velvet.
"So....whats up with you??" I whisper

They let me out at the next corner.

4 comments:

GEWELS said...

Steve- don't you know better than to hit on a couple of girls named Velvet and Lacey? Come on buddy.
At least they stopped to let you off (as opposed to kicking your ass to the curb from a moving vehicle.) That's what I would have done.Or, maybe- just maybe- I would have said yes.

Dave Mows Grass said...

Hey, the guy who hits the bullseye the most is the guy who throws the most darts. Don't hurt to try!

peteski said...

I'm feelin' it. A Gran Torino - for me - means the Sassano sisters (Janice and Debbie) and the Stop N Shop and a bucketful of disappointment.

Old Lady said...

Yes, sometimes the direct approach has a different effect.