Friday, March 20, 2015

ON DEFENSIVE DRIVING

I had to take Defensive Driving classes online a while back.  I'd been twenty years without a moving violation. I couldnt believe I picked up a speeding ticket. Normally, I drive like grandpa. You can usually find me in the slow lane, going 5 miles under the speed limit with my blinker on. 
The Defensive Driving Course was slow torture.
You couldn't whiz through it...each page was timed. I had to wait 45 seconds or more after I'd finished reading to go to the next page. By the time I got to the end of a chapter to take the quiz, I could barely remember what the chapter was about, especially since I started playing online poker to help pass the time between pages.
It took about 20 hours to get through it.

The worse part was every so often they would have “Real Life Story” video, like a guy smashing into a motorcycle or something. It was bad scriptwriting, bad acting, fake blood and stuff, and then at the end, to make sure you had watched it, they would ask a question like:


“What was the victims name?”
A. John
B. Jim
C. Joe


or “What size breasts did the traffic stopper in the purple halter have?”
A. Small
B. Medium
C. HUGE

You know, stuff that you wouldn’t know unless you actually watched the video.
And if you got the answer wrong?
You had to go back and watch it again!
AAGGHHHH!
There were a couple times I had to watch 3 or 4 times.

Next time I'll go to one of their classes in person. At least I'll be able to screw up in class. Maybe I can even get D-Hall for old times sake!

4 comments:

Vector said...

Sounds just like TORTURE

e said...

Why the heck did you end up in driving school? I hope you are doing well...

Deanna said...

Okay, I am just going to pay the fine. I'd fall asleep

bulletholes said...

Hi E! Long time no see!