Friday, November 17, 2006

WE NEVER SHOULD HAVE PUT SHOES ON THEM (birthday remix)

A few months back I posted this regarding the Red Dirt Poetry girl and she was delighted... lets have another look, shall we?

Many years back I had a job that required me to be Manager on duty for a large hotel once a month. I had to wear a business suit and the suit I had made me look like Elvis Presley during his later years..
I headed for the local “Men’s Wearhouse” because I truly admired the commercials that featured George Zimmerer announcing with all confidence that “You’re going to like the way you look. I Guarantee it!”. I would place my faith in him.
After finding a suit that fell within my price range ($10 more than the Rock Bottom prison Release issue) a Double Breasted Slate Grey affair, measurements were made and it was sent to be altered. Mind you, my fashion statement is all about dressing down to the point of Sloth, but I do know what looks good. As they were shuttling my selection to the Tailor in back, I was told to take a look around for a tie.
The salesman certainly knew that I was a bit of a Huc-Huc- Huckleberry and offered this:
"A tie is an extension of you and a reflection of your personality.”
I thought this was a very strange thing to say, right up until I saw a tie that just screamed at me. It was a kind of psychedelic paisley thing that would contrast the Slate Grey Suit in a most tasteful way. Suddenly I understood what the Salesman meant.
And even my wife “liked the way I looked.”

I was never the most creative Chef in the world and had to rely on certain tricks to gain some inspiration. One of them that worked best for me was to come up with a name for a dish and then try to work the dish around it.
Beef Brigadoon.
Scotch Salmon Cream.
Deep in the Heart.
He-man Soup.
Recently I have made a friend, RDG http://red-dirt-girl.blogspot.com/ and we have developed a little collaboration. She is into shoes and somehow we have begun to pair up shoes with meals. Kind of a “Meals on Heels “ thing. It started out to be a bit of a gas for me but she is REALLY INTO THESE SHOES and is able to provide a lot more inspiration than I ever would have thought possible coming from a shoe. She posts a shoe and I see a menu there. I pitch a Menu and she comes up with the shoe.
This little game seems to be leading to more and smarter dialog than you might expect.
I should also mention she and her son write some very nice poetry. Its coming up to a major food and shopping season so if you are short on inspiration, take a look at the RDG....its certainly got more flavor than picking out a tie!
There is only one problem I am having with this.
Every time I see a Women’s shoe these days I start makin’ like Pavlov’s Dog and drooling all over myself.
I need a bib over here!

6 comments:

Barbara said...

Happy birthday to Red Dirt Girl, who seems to be dealing successfully with a few serious challenges! I hope this next year is a level one -- not too up or too down, just in the middle.

GEWELS said...

Hmmm, shoes and food- what could be better? Oh, yeah, shoes, food and s-x.
How 'bout a pic of you in that oh so sexy tie!

Mother of Invention said...

I loved when you two did that! I couldn't stop once I got going thinking of all the dishes you could make to match "shoe" jargon!

bulletholes said...

Mother- you did great with the food/shoe match-ups! I started to post your list too...maybe we will have a chance to do that soon.
Gewels-we had a few that were starting to go beyond food and shoes and covering thing like regional tastes, music that would go with them, College football predictions...it kinda grew into more than just a "Gas"!
Barbara! You know she copied "Everyone is in Love" over there.. What a cool poem. You have a celebration comin' up quickly...

Anonymous said...

ummm Those Were The Days....my friends, I thought they'd never end......la la la la la la la la.......

Sigh. Fact is NONE of my regulars were stopping by anymore - which is the primary reason I killed the blog......oh dear....I didn't 'kill' it......I meant, I deleted it.....(hopefully there are no blog police around...)

but I certainly have been getting a lot of grief from the regulars about its demise.....

rdg

Annelisa said...

Ah, yes... the shoes, the meals... I only just started reading these (I was more hooked into the Red Dirt Poetry blog), when they were booted off the scene... A mouth-watering collaboration that rocked!