Monday, December 01, 2008

FEEL THE NOISE

A Judge says his novel punishment of forcing noise violators to listen to music they don't like for one hour has cut down on the number of repeat offenders in this northwestern Colorado prairie town.
About four times a year, those who plead guilty to noise ordinance violations are required to sit in a room and listen to music from the likes of Manilow, Barney the Dinosaur, and The Platters' crooning "Only You"
"These people should have to listen to music they don't like," said the Judge..
The Judge began the program years ago when he noticed that many of the repeat offenders simply showed up at his courtroom to pay their fine with cash.
Video of a recent class showed teenagers with long faces shifting in their seats, hoping for a quick death.

The worst offenders, mostly SOAD, Dokken, Ludacris and Coldplay listeners are made to listen to the 5th Dimension, Partridge Family and early Michael Jackson.


What I wonder is whether a lethal injection of Barry Manilow would qualify as Cruel and Unusual Punishment?


ONLY IF IT DON'T KILL YOU, BABY, ONLY IF IT DON'T KILL YOU!

"The Cyclamate of Pop Rock; He writes the Sludge"
playboy magazine

6 comments:

Angela said...

What a funny idea!
In Hamburg, they chased the junkies away who used to sit in the big hall of the main station by playing classical music all day long. It worked! Being on drugs and hearing Bach doesn`t go together!

bulletholes said...

hi Angela! You have a very nice blog!
But I have to ask, for the record, just what the heck does Bach go with?
Hmmm?
High Tea and Scones?

Barbara said...

Is listening to music not of your choice considered community service of some sort? There's a lot of music out there I would consider to be a punishing to listen to!

soubriquet said...

Those people who drive around with their car windows open and monotonous loud bompaboompaboombabombaboomba...Argh!
I try to commiserate with them on their deafness that causes the need for megawatt amplifiers....
Whereas my taste in music is, of course, impeccable.
Well, no, I don't claim that, I've listened to some crap music in my day too. But rap, with its incessant glorification of violence, intolerance, misogyny, and crime, not to mention drugs, guns and gangs... rap annoys me no end.

petra michelle; Whose role is it anyway? said...

This is hilarious! Yet, Hitler loved Wagner. Go figure!

MikeTheWaiterDotCom said...

i think even the u.s. military has used this technique... did not they blair music to get daniel noriega to surrender? it does seem beyond the purview of pure justice to allow a court to impose such punishments, but...