THE TRAINER

“You need to do 30 minutes of weight training when you come in.”
“OK.”
“Then you do 30 minutes of cardio.”
“Got it.”
“Lay down here, on your stomach. Raise up on your elbows then rock up on your knees and hold it”
(grunting)
“Try to stay under 3000 calories a day. Eat a big breakfast, and smaller meals as the day goes on. No carbs after 6:00. Can you do that?”
(grunt)"I'll try"
“Still holding? Good, get your butt down a little. That’s good. Think of us here as a college course in getting healthy. I want you to do different exercises every time you come in, to work different muscles, and different parts of muscles every time. I believe in exercise. I believe in weight training. I believe in pushing yourself. But just three days a week to start.  How you doing down there?”
(grunting)”I…believe…in…exercise”
“Good. Don’t try to train every day. Come in 3 times a week. Any more than that and you’ll hurt yourself. You have to do the weight training. For every pound of muscle you add, you will burn an extra 500 calories a day when you are at rest. People think they can come in here and run it off. It doesn't work that way. Get your butt down again. Good. This that you are doing is called a “Plank”. After a while you will do it from your toes, not your knees. That’s good. Your breathing is good. Are you OK?”
“I..(grunt)believe..(grunt)..in..(grunt)exer...cise”
“Hahaha! You are a funny guy Mr. Bullets! You can come down now”
(swoosh)