Wednesday, May 27, 2009

RHINESTONE COWBOY

Man, some mornings I wake up and its just too good to be true. The whole world smells good, every breath seems sweet and its just so great to be a human being. I start singin’ some crazy song at the top of my lungs, it was “Rhinestone Cowboy” today, while I decide that I’m going to have an Egg Sandwich at the Subway on my way to work. 

I dance my way down the hall, doing a little skippin’jig, shake my left leg out as I make a right into the shower. Turn the water on and its time for the chorus: 

  “Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo 
Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know 
And offers comin' over the phone”

I hop outta the shower and look into the mirror and man I just have to crack up. 
How the hell did I get to be so funny lookin’?
 I don't even need to make a face! 
I feel so good I decide to skip the shave today. 
Check my blood sugar, its right on! 
Even after having had the Ice Cream last night! 
Doctor told me Friday I'm doing real well, so I takes my 4 pills I am supposed to take, at least until I am cured. But, what the hell...when you feel this good, who needs to be cured? As I’m locking the front door, its time for the chorus again 

  “Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo 
Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know 
And offers comin' over the phone” 
 I’m one of these people that the louder I sing, the better I sound and man-o-man-o-man, do I sound good today! In fact, here come my neighbors down the stairs and they are all smiling at me. 
“Good morning Steve” says Miguel, a smiling little boy in the 3rd Grade. 
‘Que paso Miguelito” says I back, and we trade high fives.
 His mother just laughs and gives me a kind but quiet look. Her husband wants to know who did that song I’m singing. 
Glen Campbell I tell him and launch into the second verse for them: 
  “Well, I really don't mind the rain 
And a smile can hide all the pain 
But you're down when you're ridin' the train that's takin' the long way 
And I dream of the things I'll do 
With a subway token and a dollar tucked inside my shoe 
There'll be a load of compromisin' 
On the road to my horizon 
But I'm gonna be where the lights are shinin' on me” 

 So now I climb into my BRAND NEW 1975 Cheyenne PICK UP TRUCK and it starts right up and I’m on the way to the Subway where my friend Robin will fix me an egg sandwich. I can’t wait to walk in the door, singin this stupid happy-ass song and doing a little dance. I really have a flair for the dramatic, doncha know, and I should have pursued a career in acting, maybe attended Julliard or something. 
Yeah. Julliard, man. 

“Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo 
Like a rhinestone cowboy 
Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know 
And offers comin' over the phone” 

I can’t wait to get to work and torture Rachel with my good mood. 
Water Baby will tell you….I’m a little hard to take when I get like this!

12 comments:

petra michelle; Whose role is it anyway? said...

hahaha, Steve! If you won't strut your rhinestones, who will? ;)
Life is too short! :))

bulletholes said...

Pet1 Strut my Rhinestones! I like that! Its like a song, man!

"Waltzin' my Rhimnestones
waltzin' my Rhinestones
Who'll come a Waltzin' my Rhinestones with me"

Yeah, I'd like to hear Tom Waits sing that shit.

Anonymous said...

I remember that song and " Hi! My name is Glen Campbell.He had a show going on back then. How about Galveston? That was a beauty song.

dmarks said...

Hope for your sake, that K-Tel still sells those rhinestone guns from the TV ads.

"I am a lineman for the county...."

Barbara said...

The highs are always good, but even better when they are not substance-induced. It's OK to sing and be happy! I always did like that song.

Annie said...

I had the hugest crush on Glen Campbell, even though he's probably 30 years older than me. I loved watching his show. Thank you for reminding me!

Angela said...

I know that song, too, but I never found out what a Rhine Stone is. Sounds like a stone or a pebble from the Rhein in Germany? Or from the Rheingold? But I guess happy songs don`t have to make sense. I`m glad you`re feeling good, Buddy. And don`t sin with chocolate now!

bulletholes said...

Waitman- i remember the B side of galveston...it was called "Wheres the Playground Susie"


D', only a pimp in a New Orleans Cathouse would carry a Rhinestone six-shooter...mine are Ivory.

Barbara, I used to use just to calm me down a little. I'm even hard for ME to take every now and then.

Hey Annie! I remember Glen best as Chanticleer in "Rock-A Doodle"!

Angela, what, no Rhinestones in the Rhine? Thats just....wrong!

GrizzBabe said...

Subway has egg sandwiches?!!!? Or do you just have the hookup with Rachel?

GEWELS said...

Stevieroo- you even put me in a good mood.

Waterbaby said...

well I can almost always say "at least he makes us smile!!!" and

Angela, if they don't have rhinestones in Rhine, then I shall have to find some to send to you!!

Anonymous said...

A LITTLE hard to take?