Friday, March 30, 2007

ENTROPY INCREASES

A great bit of energy has been spent this year prodding the Water Baby into taking care of her Application, Testing, Essays and various and sundry paperwork that she must have turned in for acceptance into College this fall. She definitely has the procrastination Gene. Everything was done with much Angst and Drama at the very last Nanosecond.

I had actually decided that she was deliberately sabotaging herself because deep inside, she did not want to go to College. That's my way of freakin' out, I guess. My mind, chasm that it is, plays tricks on me.
Her Momma, for whom the Heavens and Earth must move at all times, has been her usual intense self... she is an Atomic Alarm Clock. For the last week, I have been reminded to check the Mailbox over & over & over again. Its worse than the Milk. For Babe's entire life, the letter we were waiting for loomed large, especially for her Mom.
Thank God for Mom's!!!
The babe and I stopped at the Mailbox in the pouring rain yesterday. She waited in the car and I opened the Box and there was the big white folder with Texas A&M @ Galveston in Maroon on it. I waved it at the car.
Glee and giggles comes bubbling out of the car and into the deluge...I do a little dance with it held high over my head. She clutches the packet close to her breast, closes her eyes, makes a wish and opens it.

I guess I was supposed to bring the letter of acceptance with me to do this post...I didn't. It says something like "Water Baby, You are the Bomb, Come on Down!" only they used a lot more words and sounded very impressive. I almost took a knee.

She is very excitable, this girl and she whirls around and shouts to the Heavens

"I AM ACCEPTED..HAH-HAH-HAH!!!"
and she turns and hugs me like she hasn't since she was just a little girl.

After a time, I whisper in her ear "I am so glad for you, sweetie" and she looks me into the eye.... and I just busted out cryin'.

"Whats wrong Daddy?"

"I don't want you to go. Don't go."

Well, that didn't go over real well, but I guess I looked sweet, bawlin' in the rain.

She has been so worried about a lot of things, and I have tried to tell her that if today was not her best day, then tomorrow brings another chance. Don't sweat the losses, let 'em go. We are all bound to miss a time or two.

The future rides on tomorrow, and today is so soon past.

The Future is not a result of choices among alternative paths offered by the present, but a place that is created-created first in the Mind and will- created next in activity.
The Future is not someplace we are going to, but one we are creating.

The paths are not to be found but made, and the activity of of making them changes both the maker and the future.

I'll miss all that glee that pours off of her.
Like water from a vine.



9 comments:

GEWELS said...

Steve, My opinion- I'ld lock her up and throw away the key for a few more years.
She's gorgeous.

I feel for you and what Dad's go through with their baby girls (OH, thank God I had boys).

All that said, she's one smart, tough cookie.

Barbara said...

What a cute one! We all want to be accepted. I'm glad she was. You will be lonely when she leaves, but she'll come home to tell you new stories.

Barbara said...

And besides you can go visit on Parents' Weekend and embarrass the hell our of her.

Dave said...

I never had a doubt! Congratulations on your loss, er... on her win! Does she have any idea what she wants to major in? I suspect she will spend her first two years majoring in surviving her first two years and her next two years majoring in some subject she hasn't even considered yet. I wonder what future she will create?

Cheers!

~Dave

Mother of Invention said...

Aw! Such an emotional sweet post! You're such a softie but how can she not adore you?

Congrats to her! She'll have a blast! Will she do Marching Band there?

kissyface said...

she purty.

GrizzBabe said...

How sweet! I feel verklempt. Excuse me for a minute. Talk amongst yourselves...

Old Lady said...

You big Pooh Bear!

Annelisa said...

Wow, is this Waterbaby - stunner!!

Steve, you handled that real well - for a first shot. Pity you don't get a second!! :-D Seriously, though, I know how difficult it is to let go, especially when it seems only yesterday they are a little baby bouncing on your knee, or a toddler taking first steps, or a littl'un running out of the first day of school... or the time they go to 'big school'. You've had a lot of firsts, but this one seems like the first of their independence from you - don't you believe it! Just because she's not there all the time, she'll be there - a letter, a phonecall, a message on your blog... there's plenty of chances to stay in contact... more so than ever before. It'll be fine. She's a great kid, and however far she goes, she'll still be with you!! And you with her (we all know the influence of parents, and how it sticks with you!)